THE COIN

culled: coinnews.net

THEY. You know who I am talking about. Those people. Them. The ones who are in charge of all the opinions and the concepts and ideas. They said. They said. You know what I mean.

I often imagine Them consisting of a congress of ancient, gender-less people who look very alike. Perhaps the illegitimate children of a crazy philosopher. They sit in white robes around a table, in a cold, dimly lit room. The room has dull grey cement covered by markings of the mad people who were once chained there. They, then decide for us how to think and behave and what to believe. And we let them. Because as Loki of Asgard said, “It is the unspoken truth of humanity that you crave subjugation.”

It is alright to some level because They have vast knowledge and are often right about most things anyway. But somewhere along the line, we pissed Them off didn’t we? We started to use them to lie. Parents use Them to scare kids. They said if you make funny faces, your face will stick that way. Others form their opinions as well but instead of owning up to it, they decide to say it came from Them because it is more believable. You believe things when they come from a random congress of imaginary people rather than someone you know. Tragic is it not?

We lied so much and we pissed them of. And to get back at us They decided to mess us up. By taking one of the most powerful phenomena’s of existence and lying completely about it. Love. They concocted love and they lied about all of it. That is why we are here. To uncover some of the truths.

One. They said that there is only One True Love. It is not true. If it were, then we would honor it. We would honor that feeling. And there won’t be another person after. There won’t be people saying I love you to one person and saying it to the next. Those three words would hold so much gravity we will not be able to utter it to just anyone. We would NOT have the ability to move on. To move on so quickly after professing our love. We would love just the one and the only. And that would be all. But that is not so is it? We can fall in love again and again and again. Over and over and over as if your first love, the first person who made you aware of the word, did not even exist. Then They decided to contradict themselves by saying it is a good thing to love again. But if true love really is true then you will never love like that again. But here we are.

Two. They said that if you love someone so much and with good intentions, they love you back. That it takes two for love to exist in the first place. Well that’s a fucking lie. Because you can love someone with all your heart and they won’t love you back. Yes, you can have their thoughts in your head, their voice on repeat, the smell of their skin, see their face in the faces of strangers, write poems about them, think about the names of your kids. You can have all those and yet. Not even a ventricle of their heart will beat for you. You can love them so much that it will eat you from within and make you lose sanity and they will not love you back.

It doesn’t take two to tango any bullshit. More often than not, Love is one sided. It does not take two. I don’t think it ever has. You can be in love with someone all your life and they won’t love you back. Not for any reason. They just don’t love you. They can’t because the feeling is just a “you-thing”. How embarrassing and horrible.

Three. They said true love is peaceful. It is easy. It is calm and good and joyful. What a load of crap. I have no proof of evidence that love can be all those happy joyful feelings. What I know for certain is that Love is sad and horrible and hurtful and lonely. Love is a two faced bitch. And like all two faced bitches, it never presents the bad side. No. It is always the good side that becomes the façade and just when you think you are familiar with it, it switches faster than you can say Quidditch and you are left looking in the mirror crying, wondering what the hell you missed. They presented Love as a must have feeling by painting it as wonderful just to distract us from how horrible it can be as well. A lot of us have never seen that cloud nine. But that ugly side of love, my darling, we know too well. I know too well. On the terms of being two faced, Love becomes a coin. One can only face one side at a time. If you try to look at both sides, you will end up with a thin edge, a narrow perspective with nothing to offer. To top all that, you don’t even get to choose the side. The side chooses you. Like a gamble. You will be gambling away your feelings. So I say toss that damn coin away and walk away.

Four. Love is a Their own fabrication. Which brings about the question, does it even exist? For a thing to exist, it must interact with physical and mental reality. ¹ Like the sun. It’s a sure thing. For those who cannot see it, they can at least feel it. But love is not even a theory. Because a theory has a single definition. And love, has a thousand, each one disproving the next. They said love is subjective. Everyone loves differently. Love depends. Really? Really? For one of the most powerful feelings in the world, love sure as hell is vague. Its vagueness designed specifically to lure and trap us into a false belief system. In addition there are so many kinds of love. Ranging from family, to animals, to lovers. One thing, as great as it claims to be, cannot be all these diverse things at once. Example, pain is pain. There’s only one pain. The unpleasant feeling caused by tissue damage causing a negative response to stimuli.² There are degrees of pain but pain it still retains its form. But They have us believing that love is not even in degrees. It is different. With camouflaging abilities. It has no true form. It has no single identity. Like a spy. All spies should not be trusted. And this level of uncertainty, the amount of vagueness, this diversity, should be questioned. As though they are trying to hide something. Perhaps love is simply an attachment disorder. That love is just a conspiracy theory designed to drive people at the point of madness, over the edge.

Finally, like all disorders, there’s nothing wrong with you if you have it. It's a disease. It's okay. You will still be accepted by the ones close to you. But if you can help it then do not ever make the mistake of expecting great things from it. Nothing good comes out of loving somebody. That overwhelming feeling, that craving, that horrible blanket or vulnerability, of being truly in love, your entire happiness shifting its base and angles, directing it’s source to another human being…that is some dangerous fucked up shit. Because what if you lose them to any number of various things? What do you do when you lose the source of your essence? Find new essence as if it is that easy?

Celine Dion said that “Love can touch us one time and last for a lifetime. And never let go till we’re gone.” Is that not cause for alarm? That you may be in love with an asshole or a ‘devil in form of a whore’ and it will last for the rest of your life?

Why are people rushing towards it? The word itself should be feared and not sought for. Yes, Hermione, fear of the name only increases fear of the thing itself. Fear is not weakness. It is natural. Fear is a fight or flight response. Your fear for love should increase to the highest level if possible because that bastard will swallow you like the Venus Fly trap will swallow the fly it has lured to it. It will dissolve your being in its poisonous enzymes and you will be reduced to nothing. Not ash or bones or memory. Nothing. Love reduces you to nothing. And that is the truth about love.

In conclusion, should you ever be faced with this attachment disorder, and have to make a choice, then give it. Give it to animals, give it to plants, give it to yourself and fucking stop there.

1-Wikipedia.com

2-I came up with this definition of pain myself because I know it well enough to do so.