THE SWITCH

THE SWITCH

One of my favorite lines from Ice Age (Dawn of Dinosaurs) was when Manny asked Buck. “When exactly did you lose your mind?” To which he replied, “I don’t know. I just woke up one day married to a pineapple. An ugly pineapple.”

And that is the thing about madness. You don’t exactly know when or where or how. You just wake up one day and realize there is no sanity left in you. And that is the case with Buck. He did not know what when or how. You never really know. It is not being married to a pineapple that is the moment. NO. That was the final straw. The last step. The last step is pretty big and obvious and like a declaration. You start to walk around naked. You start to scream non-stop. You kill your own child or end your life. Or in Buck’s case, you wake up married to a pineapple.

Madness is a raw form of energy. A dismissal of all normality. But truly is it the mad people that are mad or are the sane people the abnormal ones? Because a mad person has no rhyme or reason. A mad person deliberately goes against normality. Then think about it, is normality that great? Normality is a bunch of rules we are supposed to follow. Rules created out of man’s selfish interest to keep one another in check. Why should we be in check? Why not let the freak out? Like RJ Lupin said to Sirius Black, let the flesh reflect the madness within. Let the true colors show so we can choose a favorite. Do not hide behind sanity like a coward.

The beautiful thing about Madness has been stated in Alice in Wonderland. Alice replied to the Mad Hatter when he asked if he was mad. “I am afraid so.” She said. “You are entirely bonkers. But can I tell you a secret? All the best people are.”

Madness is often seen as that drastic transformation into someone you were not formally identified as. That final step is NOT what makes you mad. It is what makes you completely mad. But the first step, the one that starts to alter you, that one step into crazy, that one moment that something shifts, something becomes rattled, something alters you from who you are into the first step of becoming, you + madness. That is The Switch. And it is actually a switch. I believe if we all knew the initial point of madness and we went back there, we would hear The Switch flick. Either to turn off all the lights or to turn them all on.

Here’s the thing about The Switch. You don’t really know when, where, how or who turned it on. Because if you knew…well we would all be sane wouldn’t we? You can only guess.

The Switch has the ability to blend in. It can be anything. It may be a thought that snaps you. Or an action. Like wearing a bright T-shirt or smiling at a stranger or cutting your hair. Perhaps buying a tie-dye tapestry is your first step into madness. We do a lot of different things every day so how can we tell? Or do we know it is the red boots we bought that eventually lead to our descent into madness? It’s very clever isn’t it? The first step into madness is lost amidst daily chaos or routine and so it becomes hard to find. That’s why we say “They have lost their minds.” Because really they have. We have. I have. And I have no idea where to find it. I can only guess and that is not much help is it?

Looking at the case of the boy who has Congenital Insensitivity to Pain. A rare disease where an individual never feels any pain on any part of the body when injured. (Don't you kinda wish you felt no pain?)So his father made a barbaric show at his expense. People came to watch him get violated in the most inhuman ways possible. Then one day something in him snapped. And he lost all emotional feeling. All empathy. All sanity. On the surface, he seemed ordinary. But he became the calm before the storm. Permanently passive. Which lead to him becoming a serial killer. See that thing in him that snapped? That isn’t The Switch. The Switch was probably his father thinking it a good idea to make him a gladiator. The snapping is the final straw. The one people can see. And it’s unfortunate because that’s what people think is The Switch.

That final step, may never happen. Because for me, I look perfectly normal. I do things others do but I suspect my switch has been flicked. Something is unhinged somewhere. And it is a fear of mine that I will snap one day. I am actually interested in finding out what my final declaration will be. Perhaps it is this. This blog you are reading. Announcing to the world that I have lost my mind. But for the mean time, I am not after trying to amend it. Because I see better. Madness clears the veil covering your eyes from the real reality. You begin to see. The trees start to speak to you. The voices in your head argue with one another and everyday people blend away into the background. I see the raw. I see the hidden meanings. I read in between the lines. (Yes there are words in between all lines and they speak to me. No, they scream.)

It is glorious, this feeling. It is freedom. It is madness. I believe most of our switches have been turned on. Otherwise why would our bodies jerk, twitch and jolt in response to the repetitive slamming and banging of the hands on a stretched membrane over a hollow body? Drums they are called aren't they? And because you gave a name- dancing- to this utter madness, you think it is not madness?

How about the noise you make when you feel good. You close your eyes, raise your head and open your mouth and you let out that cackling ferocious noise from your gut, from your heart, your very being and in that moment nothing else exists but the need to release that reverberating sound. After which endorphins are released in your brain. Laughter, you call it. I call it sheer madness because if it wasn't you wouldn't try to suppress it when in company you hold to high esteem. You won't try to cover your mouth while you do it. You will not replace it with a smile.

Bear in mind then, should you ever find yourself thinking you are different, in terms of sanity, that you are among the best people. We are among the best people.

By the way I do not suppress laughter. I let that shit out and the sane people have to deal with it.